The Thinking Other Woman

What you should know BEFORE your affair.
 

Neither the husband's chart nor the wife's has anything in the perfect position to form a boomerang with the other's yod. Her Venus in Taurus is close, but it's a little off. My Saturn is one degree off--almost right on the money. Although I have to say: Venus in Taurus: Looking for a relationship where the person shows she's valued, is reliable and trustworthy, and makes her feel comfortable. Sounds kind of like what he needs to do, right? Then there's my Saturn: "WORK on valuing yourself better in this way, dammit!" 


Also noted: His ascending is almost her boomerang. It's about 4 degrees off. This could be worthy of note, since his ascending is at the VERY end of Virgo, almost in Libra. Hmm: "To solve your issues, present yourself with more intent to be of service/in a more harmonious attitude, trying to see my feelings a little more." As I've noted, if things aren't perfect, but they have something useful to say, perhaps they should be considered. Neither of these points is part of their yods. 

Let's look at the other important aspects their yods have.


1.) We know her MC and his DC are conjunct. That's their marriage: Being his most intimate relationship is her "career," or what she's most known for. Here's their intersecting yods again:

Oh, me. Do you see the problems, here? Remember that the long legs of the triangles are called "inconjunct," and reflect an interaction that just doesn't go so well, where a LOT of adjustments have to be made in order to get something to work. 


It should be noted that with their birthdates, this yod exists for them no matter what. The only thing that will change according to birth time is where her MC is. (If I have her birth time wrong, her MC could even appear at a different point on the yod, or not appear in the yod at all. However, I notice this appears most descriptive of the situation, so I left it this way.)


2.) Um … what's inconjuncting  that marriage, the MC on the DC? RORY'S FUCKING PLUTO. And we just talked about that, remember? Which could possibly be because … do you see it?


3.) His assertiveness, that Mars up there at the top, is inconjuncting not only his own Sun+Neptune, but her Neptune as well. And we just talked about her Nep Four, right? Every time he asserts his needs, it disturbs her need for that perfectly comforting childhood home, all her needs met, that she didn't get and is trying to control him into providing for her. Not only that, but you may want to check out this very illuminating article concerning her Neptune conjunct his Sun.


Uh-oh.


4.) Not only that, but look at that purple leg, their shared leg in both yods. Their union inconjuncts his Sun+Neptune, that codependent way he just mind melds like a Vulcan into how other people feel and what other people think and want. (At least Spock still remembered he was Spock and needed to be himself.) 


I'm not sure this inconjunct is entirely negative in terms of the positive, creative side of the Sun+Neptune, however, because both marriage partners are creative and pursue various crafts together, although not the same ones as each other. Sometimes they help one another with parts of craft projects.


And his Sun conjunct Neptune is inconjuncting the marriage. His codependency is affecting the marriage negatively. And, um, well … you could say with perfect truth that the marriage is negatively affecting his codependency. And now we understand why!


CRAAAAP!  Now we see why these folks had problems living together as a married couple.


What do we think of those sextiles? (Those are the short legs of the triangle, indicating aspects of the relationship that are helping each other out.) 


5.) In this case, I'm not altogether sure these "helpful" aspects are always helpful. Looking at his side of things, his assertiveness has a beneficial effect on the marriage in some way. (My guess is he's successful in asserting himself in the world, which brings home the money to support the marriage.)


6.) But on the other side, the harmonious line between her Pluto and his Sun conjunct Neptune (and don't forget her Neptune conjunct there as well, and how bad that is) … well, her controlling nature is supporting him in remaining henpecked and codependent, which supports all the dysfunctional illusion and the lack of communication and understanding in their relationship. And we see that big ol' inconjunct to the MC/DC of the marriage.


Hmm. Astrology really CAN be useful, now, can't it? Perhaps I should have done this a few years earlier and emailed it anonymously to their marriage counselor!* Because, clearly, these folks needed a lot more intensive work than they were directed to do. Say it with me: Inconjuncts require A LOT of adjustment in order to work! That would mean that a person actually has to be willing to adjust. And just look at that Pluto ...

*This is a JOKE. I have no idea who that person was, and I would NEVER be such an idiot. After all, that would be a terribly Pluto-conjunct-ascending thing to do!